Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Chapter Three

"I used to believe
That love is many things
That love conquers all
Turns caterpillars into butterflies
Turns rain into rainbows
Turns seeds into blossoming bouquets
Turns pain into comfort
Turns two complete strangers
Into the back of each other’s hands"

“Mute little orphan girl! Mute little orphan girl! Poor little mute orphan girl!”

Steadfastly, she keeps walking.
Her eyes dead ahead.
Picking up her pace as the voices around her grew louder and louder, without even a backward glance.

The same corridor, but it now seemed too long winding and never ending.
It’s ironic how the same things and places can give you completely inverse feelings within such a short span of time.

Most of the eyes are on her, some curious, some amused, very few sympathetic.

From the moment she stepped into the classroom this morning, things couldn’t have taken a worse turn. She stood there, silently staring at her feet as the teacher urges her to introduce herself.
“If you’re too shy to say much, then just please tell us your name…”
She continued to stare at her feet. Minutes and minutes passed by.

“You may take a sit then…” She continued to stare at her feet. Until a girl who was sitting at the back of the room stood and walked up to her.
Without a word, she grasped hold of her hand, and quietly lead her to the empty seat beside her.
“Don’t worry, everyone gets nervous on their first day, I’m Daisy by the way,” she smiled while trying to make eye contact with her.
She looked up and saw a yellow sunflower, blossoming and basking in the tender morning sunlight, calm and beautiful right in front of her. She can't help but smile back…

She stood still at the school gate. Her watery eyes looked up from time to time, trying to spot a sight of him walking out of the school building. But whenever she accidentally made eye contact with anyone else, her pupils would shrunk as if coming in contact with glaring bright lights. And as if natural reflects, her face would instantly look down and her eyes back to fixating on the ground and the few strands of dried grass by her feet.
It was during one of those moments that she felt a thick warm palm resting behind her back.
Caught off guard, she quickly shifted her body to a few inches of safe distance away.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you like that,” he said apologetically.
Looking up, she felt a tremendous relieve at the sight of another friendly and familiar face throughout that unusually long day.
And again, she smiled. Vaguely but assertively.

"Love like water
A single stream that flows, calm and quiet
For it runs long, deep, and endless."

“So how was your first day?” He asked during their walk home.
She looked up at him, her grip on the strap of her bag tightens as she tried her best to force out a nonchalant smile.
“Not so great huh,” he said with a knowing smile, though her reaction pulled at his heartstring a little, “no worries, it will get better…” he wasn’t even sure if the reassurance was meant for her or himself.
"That's just how some people are, they tend to reject unfamiliar things. I guess you can call it a natural defense mechanism. Once they get to know the real you, all these other things wouldn't even matter anymore."
she stared at him, wondering if he was actually speaking to her or more to himself.
"Some people, we unconsciously put up a thorny front that would put people off and keep them away from even trying to come close to us. That is our defense mechanism. Like it or not, we can't help it, not after the sort of things we've seen, and felt..."
as his voice gets tinier, his otherwise tall frame seems to have shrunk along with it in her eyes.

Suddenly, for the first time, she had the urge to protect him.
She felt the need to hold him and tell him that things will be fine.
To stop the stream of sorrows and insecurity that had been pooling up underneathe that seemingly cheery disposition of his.

But at that exact moment he turned and looked at her,
"But we'll be alright, you and I. We have each other now, so there's nothing to be worried about. I'll be your friend, your family... I'm your big brother!"
as he grinned and held her hand.

Her heart was filled with the warmth of his words.
But besides that, something else was pulling at her heartstring. Tugging it deep into the pit of her stomach.
She couldn't decide whether it was a good feeling.
She knew she was supposed to feel joy, now that she had someone, she had family.
But why was it that her heart refused to agree with her head?

As she gently placed her left palm on her chest, she could feel the beating, no longer strong and steady, growing weaker, and weaker... Something inside of her was slowly withering and died, as something else took over...