a day

I woke up at eleven, sat on my bed, feeling sad and gloomy. It must be the weather.

then i continue to sit on my bed. then i..... continue to sit on my bed, and ...... continue to sit on my bed....

i'm loosing it. or did i already lost it? i'm trying to live life like any other day, like any other person. but its difficult, it really is. i've lost it, i've completely lost it....

will i ever get it back? i can't help but wonder. and wonder. and wonder.

went for lunch with pn Kong and pn Ki, managed to cheer up a bit. life seems blissfully peaceful for everyone. i'm happy for them. i really am.

got home then, didn't want to sit on the bed no more, so sat on the rug beside my bed. laid my head on the bed, while staring at the only hamster i have left(she's a very tough one, she survived pn. ki, so i think she can survive anything). had a good and mindful conversation with her, then sent her back to her cage. sat on the bed again. put on a movie on my computer, my eyes watching, but my mind is floating elsewhere.

got a call frm christine, listened to her problem, tried to give some sound advise, but mostly failed. she hung up. i continue to sit on the bed.

called chek, he's busy bowling. he hung up. i sat on the bed. turn on my favourite chinese oldies cd. i'm sitting on the bed......